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sad pandas support group

Discussion in 'Social Discussion' started by Eetha, Jan 12, 2016.

  1. Jaded

    Jaded
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    The real themildone

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    Although I totally understand and would probably convince myself not to go.

    Something something Do as I say not as I do or whatever
     
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  2. themildone

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    the real Jaded

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    I messaged the pastor's wife and told her I'm going so I can't back out later when I change my mind lol. :grimace:
     
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  3. sinon

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    Watashi ga Kita!

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    nvm lol
     
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    #1763 sinon, Sep 14, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2018
  4. savvylabell

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    meh

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    it don't hurt like it used to


    watching a show, a couple who was rife with tragedy in their life, breaking up despite loving each other

    "i love you."

    "yeah, I love you too"

    "so this is how it ends"


    that sounds exactly like 491 days ago. so tears are happening.
     
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  5. themildone

    themildone
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    the real Jaded

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    I went to the church thing. It was a lot of fun. I didn't get back until almost 1 AM and kiddo got up early (of course) so I'm basically half dead right now. But it was worth it.
     
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  6. mboone73

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    [​IMG]
     
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  7. themildone

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    the real Jaded

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    thought I might actually sleep well tonight. went to feed my rats before bed and...well. let's just say there were only 1.5 rats in the cage. I don't know if the live one killed him or what, they never ever fought, but they both seemed perfectly healthy yesterday so idk. it was super fucking gruesome. I'm shaking and just keep seeing him, even though I only got a glimpse of him because as soon as I realized what I was looking at I stepped away and luckily my brother-in-law came over and 'took care of it' for me. I'll still have to clean out the cage, which is going to be fucking awful, but not as bad.

    I know they're 'just' rats, but fucking a, man.
     
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    #1767 themildone, Sep 15, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 15, 2018
  8. ducky

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    planned obsolescence

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    Sometimes people give simple, yet surprisingly efficient/effective advice you never thought of.
     
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  9. Jaded

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    The real themildone

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    I'm such a failure as an adult.

    * Jaded cries.
     
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  10. mboone73

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    Um, you wrote a book. If I tried to write a book, it would turn into something like Mboone73's List of Nicknames for Boobs or something.

    The last three years have been pretty rough for me, and my mind has gone to some pretty dark places. Mistakes were made, but also some things happened that were beyond my control. Without going into detail, there was some major culture shock. But I've felt how you feel many times.

    We all make mistakes, but we each have value and bring something unique into this world. Adversity builds character. The finest steel is forged in the hottest fire. Have I missed any? :)

    Anyway, our experiences make us who we are. And I think people are less interesting who haven't been through some things, or too stupid to realize it.
     
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  11. themildone

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    the real Jaded

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    I think the same thing about myself pretty often. I just try to remind myself that success is pretty relative. I got out of the house today. For me, that's a success. Just because it isn't something as big as 'bought a house' or 'earned a bachelor's degree' (which are ones I beat myself up about a lot) doesn't mean it isn't still a success. :hug:
     
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  12. Jaded

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    The real themildone

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    :hug:
    I'd rate myself moderately successful if I'd just get the whole driving thing done. I think part of my problem is that everyone in my life just doesn't care if I drive, so they don't care if I practice, and if I'm not actively up and LET'S GO DRIVING they won't suggest it. And half the time I won't suggest it because I just don't have the motivation because it's scary.

    Which is my own problem, not theirs, which loops back to the failure thing.


    * Jaded is full on self-pity mode today.
     
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  13. themildone

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    the real Jaded

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    oh man, I totally understand that one. I don't drive either. I'm finally started to get to a place where I want to start trying again but the only people who will let me use their car is my parents, and they're always like 'let's do it tomorrow instead' but then of course tomorrow never comes. So I'm stuck depending on them (which they bitch about but I think that's secretly their plan).
     
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  14. Jaded

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    The real themildone

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    "Let's do it tomorrow" or "Later" is the story of my life, I swear.

    I totally think that secret plan is a thing. Obviously I dont' know your parents but I know a few people that do it. They eat up the "I"m such a helpful person" thing whenever they "help."

    unrelated:

    I'm fixin to eat a eff ton of candy corn and play WoW, today seems like a bust anyway.

    Me: I sure hate my eating habits
    Also me: holy shit candy corn is a dollar rn.
     
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  15. themildone

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    the real Jaded

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    yeah my parents like to ask me for money because 'we help you out sooooo muuuchhhh' even though I pay them for that, anyway.
    I had cookies for dinner last night then bitched about my fat stomach this morning, which made me want to eat my feelings. it's a vicious cycle. :shrug:
    edit: I, too, am going to go play WoW...as soon as kiddo goes to bed.
     
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  16. mboone73

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    Laugh at my pain...

    So, I've been checking in on mom's place while she's in Italy. Watering the plants, checking the mail, making sure no one is sleeping in one of the closets, etc. Anyway, she has a small garden in her backyard. Today, the weight of her bell pepper plant had collapsed the wooden garden trellis she was using to hold it up. So, I made an attempt to secure it back in the ground. Now, when I was about to push down on it, I was expecting it to resist my force even if only a little bit. It did not. It immediately snapped into pieces. It's true I have lost some weight. But when I get all of my weight going in one direction, I'm not going to be able to stop without something to hold on to. So, into the garden I went, almost impaling myself on a piece of the trellis. I also broke my mom's bell pepper plant in half.

    So, when mom gets home, it's going to be like my teenage years all over again. I'm gonna have some splainin' to do.

    And that's pretty much how everything I've tried to accomplish has gone today. The others weren't as humorous though.
     
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  17. themildone

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    the real Jaded

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    oh man...to be fair, though, trellis(es?) are really thin and not meant to hold a person's weight lol. I'm glad you didn't get impaled :hug:
     
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  18. mboone73

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    In my defense, it wasn't my intention put all of my weight on it.
     
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  19. savvylabell

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    meh

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    Glad you didn’t die!
     
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  20. themildone

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    the real Jaded

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    got shamed today because I don't think I want another child. My neighbor asked when my bf and I are going to give my son a sibling and I said I don't think I want any more. She starts going on about how that's not good for my son, children are a blessing, babies aren't that hard, etc. etc. Now I feel guilty as shit because she's probably right about kiddo being better off if he had a sibling. But I 1) don't think I would cope well at all with losing another and 2) don't think I can handle coming off my meds to get pregnant and 3) the possibility of having postpartum psychosis again, which would be an even worse thing now because there's a toddler in the mix. So...yeah. My feelings are all over the place about something I wasn't even upset about before. Thanks, nosy neighbor.
     
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