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sad pandas support group

Discussion in 'Social Discussion' started by Eetha, Jan 12, 2016.

  1. themildone

    themildone
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    I need a drink

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    I'm so glad you had a breakthrough (if that's what you want to call it? idk). I started keeping a mood tracker on Jan 1 this year, and have noticed the same thing you have. You totally just reminded me that I need to try to remember that when I'm feeling depressed, though. So thanks! :hug:
     
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  2. Jaded

    Jaded
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    Obnoxious String

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    :hug2:

    Breakthrough is as good a word as any. :) In fact, I kinda like it. I don't know why I post in spoilers in here. It's like I'm trying to whisper. :thinking:
     
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  3. ducky

    ducky
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    rainbow person

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    same about people
    last december i tried to start up a journal for good things/things im looking forward to but fell off that wagon pretty quickly, maybe i could try it again. just seems hard to pick out good things that happened in my day when it's just average things you should be doing anyway
     
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  4. Jaded

    Jaded
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    Obnoxious String

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    My journal has mostly been nonsense letters to myself. (I've always journaled like that though.)

    When I've tried to make them themed (like good things or whatever) I've failed pretty quick like, so I just ramble. I'm pretty good at that. I write it as if I'm writing a letter. Sometimes really short ones. I figure having a silly one line entry is better than breaking the habit and skipping a day. The other day I wrote "Hey you, today has been pretty average. Zelda sneezed and that was pretty cute. Anyway I've got to go take a shower I'm kinda gross. Later." *weird heart cross thing I sign letters with*


    Anyway, hopefully this is helpful and not just me giving myself an excuse to ramble. good luck duck <3
     
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  5. Jaded

    Jaded
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    Obnoxious String

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    Oh, the people part. I need to figure out how to do something about that, instead of just writing "Oh hey, this person causes me to have red days. I should totally still hang out with them and talk to them."
     
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  6. MerryLou

    MerryLou
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    unpalatable

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    Have you tried candied or crystallized ginger for high anxiety? Works for me especially with the stomach pain.

    Hope your move goes well!
     
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  7. Horse Feathers

    Horse Feathers
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    There's no future in time travel.

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    I lost a dear friend last night. Only 47 and finally succumbed to cancer. He was the closest thing to a little brother I ever had. We spent many many hours on the water. Rest in peace Mark. :(

     
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  8. Miriette

    Miriette
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    Shitpost Appreciator

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    Cancer deaths are always sad, but 47 is way too young. I'm really sorry for your loss. I hope you and all of his loved ones are gonna make it through this okay.
     
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  9. Jaded

    Jaded
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    Obnoxious String

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    :hug: sorry for your loss :(
     
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  10. ducky

    ducky
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    rainbow person

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    I just remembered I posted this :thinking:
    took some time today to write about what i've been feeling so far with my new medication, if anything it's something i can look back at. i'm not gonna post the whole thing here cause it's tl;dr like 2 pages of rambling about random stuff but i'm feeling like it's making some difference so far, but i'm wondering if that feeling is a fluke. it's also still too soon to tell, only been 3 weeks and we're still figuring things out in terms of other things wrong with me and what i should be taking
     
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  11. savvylabell

    savvylabell
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    cowgirl and dog wrangler

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    i haven't but i have a huge aversion to the taste of ginger.

    I do need to break out my magnesium drink though, that was really helpful.
     
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  12. sinon

    sinon
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    Make It Happen

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    I've been dealing with coming to terms with my parents being narcissists. My mom has NPD. It sucks. I didn't realize any of this until I moved back to Florida. My partner and I live in this house my Nana passed on to me. We try to live our independent lives as we have been for five years now. But my parents still treat me and, by proxy, my partner like children. It's frustrating.

    They say abusive things. They do abusive things. There is no remorse or sympathy or anything because they are narcissists, and they won't change. This is after weeks and weeks and weeks and weeks (months and months) of researching to open my eyes to how they are, incredibly dysfunctional people. And I am just very tired. The only thing I can do is go No Contact or Low Contact with them and basically act like the adult I feel I am, not give in to their whims, say no when I need to say no, and control my emotions around them when they continuously search to push buttons.

    But every conversation is a reminder and takes me back to feeling like a two year old. My parents have desperately tried to infantilize me. This house is in my name. I do chores, I pay bills, I do yard work, etc etc etc. The other day I tell my mom I might need to go into the attic and she says I shouldn't because what if I fall and get hurt. Or times she has told me I should not do our yard work because it "is not a job for me" and to just let "mom come up and take care of it."

    Needless to say, the happy reunion I thought I'd have coming home has been far from. It's in the distance somewhere unseen and untouchable. Inevitably, the parent factor puts a strain on me and my partner. And me, the one trying to recover from years of emotional and verbal abuse from them. I can't truly go no contact here. So low contact is what I do, and even then, it takes a toll on me that I wish it didn't.

    There is no reasoning with a narc. There is no hope changing a narc. The only power I have is with myself. Sometimes I view us moving down here as a trial, you know? Like the universe wants me to learn from this and rise to the challenge so I can grow myself. And I will do that. But ffs it's hard. It's frustrating. The acknowledgement I want, I simply won't get. They will never stop seeing me as a child despite being independent.

    Narcs are a whole different level of... bleh. And some days I wish it would change but then I remember it won't lol.

    [​IMG]
     
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  13. themildone

    themildone
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    I need a drink

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    boyfriend went to get cigarettes last night around 1am, had to walk because we don't have a car. Not a big deal, he does it all the time. I got a call from his dad at 3:30am saying he was picked up and arrested. Apparently he had an old warrant, but that doesn't make any fucking sense because he's had his name run recently because another cop stopped to ask him what he was doing out so late, and nothing came up. So now boyfriend's in jail. I'm waiting for my sister to get up so she can watch kiddo while I go to the jail because he has some meds he needs. Today is visiting day but it's by appointment only and I don't know if I can see him the same day I schedule it. If not, I have to wait until Tuesday. I'm wondering if he lied to his dad about the warrant and something else actually happened, because he was slightly buzzed (alcohol) when he left and he has a tendency to drink more than he means to. I have no idea if/when/how I can call him because I've never dealt with this shit before. but last time something like this happened he ended up in a mandatory alcohol program thing that he had to live in for 4 months.

    so basically I'm freaking out, have almost zero information (which I fucking hate because anxiety) and there's not a damn thing I can do about it right now.
     
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  14. savvylabell

    savvylabell
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    cowgirl and dog wrangler

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  15. themildone

    themildone
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    I need a drink

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    I got to visit him. About a year and a half ago he was released from a halfway-house type program and went before the judge, the judge okay'd him and he was released. apparently, for some reason, he's had a warrant out since then for failure to appear. so either today or tomorrow he goes before the judge here, who will order him to be extradited to where the failure to appear was (out of state). What happens then...I have no clue. I put some money on his phone account but because he's in holding, I don't even know if he can make phone calls yet or if so, when. I don't even know if they'll let him know it's on there. I schedule an appointment to see him tomorrow, but I have no clue when he's going to go before the judge or how quickly he'll be extradited once the order is given, so I don't know if I'll actually get to see him. I'm running on about 3 hours of sleep. I tried to eat and threw it back up. I'm worried fucking sick. He's been doing so good with his drinking and everything, staying on track, and still he gets fucked over. We have no idea if he'll be released and fined or if he'll have to serve time. And if he does have to serve time, we have no idea how much. And once he's extradited, I won't be able to fucking see him because I don't have a car and I really really don't think anyone will take me 2.5 hours to see him.
     
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